


You Said You’d Grow Old With Me

by goatfelons



Category: Community (TV)
Genre: M/M, Post-Canon, Sad, Short, Song Inspired, Song Lyrics, Unhappy Ending, i love you abed, im sorry its sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:22:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28145289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goatfelons/pseuds/goatfelons
Summary: Abed drafts a letter to Troy
Relationships: Troy Barnes/Abed Nadir
Comments: 5
Kudos: 28





	You Said You’d Grow Old With Me

**Author's Note:**

> Based on You Said You’d Grow Old With Me by Michael Schulte. A lot of the quotes from this are lines in the song. Go listen to it, it's a really good song. Since these are song quotes I don’t even know if Abed would word stuff this way, but it’s mostly about the feelings anyway.  
> This was not proof read at all.

Being a clone worked until it didn’t. Abed knew he wasn’t really a clone, though it was a good coping mechanism for about a year and a half until his unresolved sadness about Troy leaving crashed around him.

He thought,’ maybe I’ll write him a letter. I’ll find a way to get it to him, I’ll tell him how I feel and then maybe I won't feel so miserable.’ 

It was late in the evening when he had this idea, but he still rolled out of bed and walked to his office across the hall from his bedroom. His apartment was cold, and it was even colder in his office because the air conditioning had been blasting all day with the door closed. 

He sat down in his desk chair and ripped a page out of his notebook. He flipped a pen around in his fingers for a moment, too nervous to start writing. Eventually he clicked the pen, and started writing his letter to Troy.

\---

Troy,

Hi, Troy. It’s been a really long time since we’ve been able to talk. Which is sad, I miss getting your emails. How are you? I hope you’re seeing so many cool things, I hope you’re having fun.

I wish I could say I’m okay, but I’m not. The clone idea kind of stopped working, I really miss you, more than before. I know I’m not a clone, I know I’m original Abed, and original Abed misses you. It’s been really hard to sleep, thinking about what you’re doing, if you’re okay.

I’m happy for you and I think it’s cool that you get to do this, but there’s so much that I never got to tell you. Thought we had the time, had our lives. I didn’t give you the goodbye I wanted to give you, and now I can’t. I thought you were going to be the person that didn’t leave me. Why did you leave me here behind? I know why, I guess. For adventure and for money. But why am I always the person who gets left?

You said you would grow old with me. We had plans and visions of what we were going to do together. Big stuff like you were going to make an app, and little stuff like costumes for that kick puncher movie. I’m glad you get to go find who you are, I just wish I could do that too. I like making movies, it’s everything I wanted to do, it just feels like a big part of me is missing, and I won’t feel right until you get home.

I’m in love with you, Troy. I always have been. I just wish I got to tell you that before you left. But I didn’t. Maybe it would’ve stopped you. Maybe it would’ve made goodbye harder. Maybe it would’ve scared you away faster.

\----

Abed stopped writing. He knew Troy couldn’t read this. Abed wrote it for Troy but he didn’t want him to read it. He crumbed the paper up and threw it at the trashcan. It bounced off the side onto the ground and Abed sighed. He got up from his chair and dropped it into the basket.

He thought ‘I should really call Annie in the morning.’

He went back to his room, into his empty bed, and didn’t sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this sorry it's not great


End file.
